And that spells trouble. Along these same lines, many times people stop being interested in sex when they stop feeling good about their bodies. Look for the small flutters Dr. Don't just say "no" - If you aren't in the mood, and sometimes you won't be, it's okay to say "no. Perhaps it's the seesaw phenomenon at work; the more one person does of something, the less the other person does. In fact, it's entirely possible that the cat and mouse dynamic in your relationship has dampened your desire, even fooled you into thinking you don't like sex anymore. Your future together depends on it. If you are one of those people, you need to do something to change the way you feel about your body.
Plan a weekend getaway. Do you like back rubs, hot baths, sexy lingerie, certain kinds of touching, some positions more than others, moving slowly or speeding up? Really think about it. If you are one of those people, you need to do something to change the way you feel about your body. Unless you address this directly, you aren't going to get very far. The benefits of being in shape extend far beyond your improved sex life. A poor body image often makes people feel self-conscious and they will either avoid sexual encounters or be so tense they don't enjoy themselves. If this is uncomfortable for you, consider reading an "improve your sex life" self-help book together at night. I know this has not been your intention. Again, if your partner won't join you , go yourself. Discuss whether herbal remedies or dietary changes may be helpful. Schedule an appointment for you and your partner with a therapist who is trained and experienced in the area of sexuality If you are a man whose sexual desire has plummeted due to your having sexual problems such as impotence or performance anxiety, a certified sex therapist can teach you many different techniques to overcome these difficulties. Perhaps it's the seesaw phenomenon at work; the more one person does of something, the less the other person does. Recall times you were feeling sexier and ask yourself what you were doing differently then. Even elderly and chronically ill people can enjoy a robust sex life. Spend time with friends. You may also wonder if you will ever feel the same way about being sexual as you once did. So, get out those running shoes Or, just because you aren't in the mood yourself doesn't mean you can't do something to pleasure your spouse. You can't rely on your marriage to be the sole source of your happiness. Unlike the last suggestion where you are advised to look for the small flutters, I am now suggesting that you don't necessarily need to feel turned on at all in order to initiate sex or respond to your partner's advances. Were you in better shape back then? Although there are many books from which to choose, the one I most strongly recommend is Hot Monogamy, by Dr. Here are a couple of suggestions that might help boost your spouse's morale. So too with sex. This post offers 11 tips for the spouse whose desire for sex has seemingly vanished. Decide to become adventurous and try things you haven't tried before to see if you find them enjoyable.
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Tips for the Spouse with the Lower Sex Drive
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